Sunday, October 26, 2014

Blessings Allowing Us to Seek Non Covered Services

What an emotional weekend! On Friday Jesse had visits from co-workers from ETC, who presented him with donations that had been given on his behalf. What an amazing company - how do we nominate a business for "best place to work" in Madison?
Thank you all  for your prayers - Jesse is grateful for each of our prayer warriors.

Every eve I massage Jesse with essential oils that are known to help with cancer. We also use a lotion by Ancient Minerals with magnesium chloride added, Arbonne SeaSouce gelee to draw out lactic acid and soothe muscle, cesium chloride spray, and DMSO. (well, actually a plethora of bottles lined up). We try to work this in 2-3x a day so I can change around what we are using since the skin is such a great conductor.

Earlier in the week I added Swedish Bitters to the protocol to help boost digestion and increase appetite (seeing we were getting no where with insurance on Marinol), and the black cumin seed oil also arrived, which has been found very effective in prostrate as well as other cancers..

On Saturday I located a practitioner at Hopewell Wellness Center on Odana Road that offers a HempVap. It's a battery operated pencil that allows you to breathe in CBD oil vapor. It is a low concentration...since Marinol was not approved by insurance, I was grateful to have found this product. The hope was to take  the edge off the pain so Jesse could withstand lying flat for 40 minutes, while I sandwich him between far infra red Bio-Mats set at 156 degrees...that was my goal.  He inhaled about 10 times and we he was able to withstand a full BioMat session - which has not happened since Labor Day weekend.  Granted, he was very stiff after lying still so long, and it was tough getting him off the massage table...
It does seem the negative ion therapy, that is a part of BioMat, woke up some nerves, and also prompted elimination of toxins.  This is an answer to prayer. 

I have suspected for some time that Jesse has not been shedding the dead cancer cells fast enough. I listened to one of the oncologists that runs an alternative clinic in Mexico this weekend in the "Quest for the Cures" series...and the doctor spoke of weakness, pain and poor doing that comes with a toxic buildup.

On Sunday Jesse felt a lot less pain - AMEN to that! When I apply the oils I always ask where he is feeling the most pain...and on this eve he said he really did not have any, unless I were to push hard on his lumbar.  Let us pray it continues to go in that direction.

This upcoming week we see the chiropractor, and a new doctor at the UW Integrative Medicine department. The person we purchased the HempVap from is a Alkaline/pH Lifecoach and we may add her to our team. There is an alternative medicine practitioner in Fitchburg, whom I learned is a biochemist. Biochemists seem to have the knowledge on how to reverse the cachexia. I plan to look at the clinic site and call to see how much experience, and success, they have with advanced cancer care.
We would like prayer that Dr. Weber at the integrative dept., who practices acupuncture on Tuesdays, might have an opening for us, if not this week, then next. I figure if we cannot get an appointment until March, we will see him as an acupuncturist. 

We have been blessed with donations this week by Jesse's co-workers, friends and family that are allowing me to step aside from seeking help at U.W. - which has not proved to be very helpful. We will pay out of pocket for uninsured services, as we are certain it is the only chance for true healing.

Sarah D. - it was nice to meet you Friday and yes, your prayer is answered, Jesse may have turned a corner this weekend. Let's hope it continues ...

Blessings to you all,

Friday, October 24, 2014

Bittersweet Memories

Our daughter Abby turns 12 on the 24th. I know the best present she could have had was for her dad to be well again.
Looking at this scrapbook layout I did probably 6 years ago - I see a healthy husband.
For my "law of attraction" friends who wanted a photo of Jesse healthy - here you go. Envision him well and with that more rounded face.
As we head into the last week of October it has been a rough one. Usually this is our most favorite month of the year - with celebrations of our kid's birthdays and our anniversary.
The kid's birthdays came and went with very little fuss. Fortunately, one of Abby's sweet friends threw her a party yesterday.
Next year we will have cause for great celebration when the Lord heals his broken, earthly son and makes him whole again. Meanwhile, we rejoice knowing that His love never fails...He is with Jesse through the pain endured at night, and we celebrate each morning he awakes to fight yet another day in this battle called cancer.


Tuesday, October 21, 2014

Bulging Discs...As in PLURAL!

A revelation today from the chiropractor in town, Reeson Chiropractic, that we switched Jesse over to last week. Dr. Reeson and I went over the MRI scans this afternoon. Looking beyond the cancer...I wanted to track down any present tumors, so I could target them with essential oils and BioMat infrared heat - both scientifically proven to reduce and/or eradicate tumor activity.
The scans are from 9-22 in which we were told there was nothing pressing on anything important (not exactly those words)...

THREE bulged discs L3-L5, and also a bulged disc in the neck, C6. 
Having been there 15 years ago with bulged/ruptured L5/S1, and remembering how debilitating it was - I cannot imagine the PAIN Jesse is going through with FOUR bulging discs. It is no wonder his legs have basically atrophied...and it is no wonder the pain meds are not touching it...

On a more positive note...we didn't see any tumor (his MD had said lower lumbar may have a tumor in July). Dr. Reeson did not find the PET scan images all that helpful, and it was unclear to him as to whether tumors were present in the scans from July. 

A veteran of chronic back pain and multiple disc surgeries, I have little doubt that all of the excruciating pain Jesse is experiencing is from bulged discs pressing on the main communication center/nerves. Because L3-L5 directly communicate to the prostrate, it is going to make cancer eradication all that much more tough as we still have a compromised nervous/immune system.

We will continue the anti-inflammatory foods, supplements, essential oils and FDA approved BioMat medical device to continue reducing active cancer cell activity, and now - hoping it will alleviate bulging discs with targeted chiropractic care. Dr. Reeson said acupuncture would be helpful as well to release endorphins, but we learned today that our insurance excludes acupuncture treatment. Even an oncologist referral would not matter.

For those just checking in, in case you missed it...we did receive word on Friday that the newest HCG test indicates that active cancer cells (aka LIVE cells, vs dead cancer cells - a PSA accounts for both) are down, from 52.6 on September 1 to 52.2 as of October 15.

Our specific prayer requests:
1. Cancellation for Dr. Weber's office, Jesse's new PCP at the UW integrative medicine clinic.
2. Pray for an appeal to insurance to approve Marinol, not only for increased appetite but pain relief. The multiple Oxy---- drugs are really not touching it.
3. A means to pay for acupuncture from Dr. Weber out of pocket - the newly chose practitioner provides this on Tuesdays. Although we could go to another acupuncturist for less, it makes sense to have fewer hands involved and it would allow Jesse's regular doctor to become more familiar with his body and how it is functioning (or lack there of).
4. Many prayers needed for weight gain...for the Spirit to remove cachexia tendencies from Jesse's body.
5. SLEEP to heal.

Thank you for your continued prayers,

Monday, October 20, 2014

While watching "Reflections" this early morning on Daystar, this verse showed up... 2 Cor 12:9. "...“My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness. Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.

I'm am weak and know Christ's power is resting on me. Thank you father!


Saturday, October 18, 2014

Oncology Discussion, Part 2 & Intro to Cachexia

A few more days have passed since I started the update from our oncology appointment. Seems every waking moment not spent caring for my husband, children (although they are very much on their own these past few months), some housework, and meals (focused on Jesse) - I am reading books, PubMed research data on meds or natural cancer fighting agents, focusing on cachexia (muscle wasting). I have little time for social media, even our own blog, and my business is on its own for the most part. Apologies for the delay for those waiting...

As was mentioned in the first part of this update - Jesse's cancer is too diffused in the bone for radiation to target, and per the first oncologist, chemo will not do much of anything for this type of cancer. Besides that, neither radiation and chemo eliminate cancer stem cells...only mature cancer cells. What this means is it can come back if stem cells remain. Jesse has said from the start that he doesn't feel he should have to kill the healthy part of his body to deal with the cancer.

With cachexia (muscle wasting) being the real threat, IMO, at this time...and lack of appetite - I sought to have these issues addressed. Dr. Hie feels Megace would increase Jesse's appetite. The idea behind this drug is women get more hungry when they are pregnant and progesterone levels are high. I had learned that progesterone is thermogenic and anabolic...and can actually help with weight loss. I attriubute progesterone to my own easy weight loss success four years ago, and a client had told me, happily, that she had lost 10 lbs changing nothing in her diet, but using transdermal progesterone cream. I can't help but think there must be something else, besides synthetic progestin, in the Megace formula that works synergestically for weight gain. We continue to hope Marinol will be approved by the insurance company to increase Jesse's appetite.

Regarding muscle wasting...I told Hie about bio-chemist, nutritionist Walter Last, of whose protocols we started implementing a few weeks ago. This includes Cesium Chloride, and we have the benefit of working with an expert coaching us through its use. Hie said he recalls another bio-chemist, from Russia, whose research had very good results with cachexia...however, the FDA never approved it. LIGHT BULB MOMENT! Immediately in my mind I thought if the FDA did not approve it must work!

I dug around a bit, and quickly found what I was looking for. Hydrazine Sulfate. This has been mentioned to me several times, and in fact, several days before our oncology appointment I had printed out information the protocol and it was still in the printer...

"Of all of the alternative treatments for cachexia, perhaps Hydrazine Sulphate is the best known. The reason is that it was designed specifically for cachexia.
Hydrazine Sulfate works on stopping the cycle just mentioned. Hydrazine Sulphate, or more commonly Hydrazine Sulfate, “interrupts the ability of the liver to convert lactic acid from tumours into glucose thereby helping to starve the tumours and inhibit their ability to metastasise.”

Since I began our update we did receive our HCG test results back from the Navarro Medical Clinic...and it was good news. The test measures the amount of active (live) cancer cells, simply put. The first test is a baseline, and subsequent testing will tell you if the protocol you are using is working, or not. If the number stays the same or is less, your cancer treatment is working. If it goes is time to change it up.

Jesse's original test, sent in August 28 after 6 weeks on our protocol, was 52.6. and now it is 52.2. Which means there is less active cancer, but as a reminder, HCG does not provide the type of, or aggressiveness of cancer. When I asked Dr. Navarro about the cachexia, continued weight loss, he replied,
"Assuming that no new lesions have developed over time or if the lesions have decreased in size, this will explain the lowering of the HCG result . However, the result being positive is still indicative of the presence of the cancer. As long as the cancer cells are present, expect weight loss. However, if he is on an alternative regimentation, most of the food taken as well as supplements have fewer amounts of calories and can also play a role in weight loss."

I have also read a statistic that 20% of cancer patients do not die from cancer, but from cachexia - muscle wasting. The cancer doesn't worry me, what DOES worry me is cachexia. I know we are to give all our worries to the Lord, but the weight loss is stressing me out. Jesse is much more at peace than I am, to be honest. I know cesium chloride takes minimum 3 months, and could take up to 2 years to eradicate cancer that has metastasized, but I cannot help but wonder if hydrazine sulfate should be brought on board - either instead of cesium or in addition to.

From the Cancer tutor website, and explanation:
Hydrazine Sulfate blocks the cachexia cycle in the liver, and cesium chloride blocks the cachexia cycle in the cancer cells!
The two protocols can be used together. I realize I should give cesium chloride protocol more time, but it is very hard to be patient when you see the man you love most wasting away. I see what others do not.

What we need to find a way to do: STOP the liver from converting the lactic acid into glucose thereby breaking the cachexia cycle. For more on how cancer cells work visit this link for a PDF.

From all that I have been digging up, there is NO conventional treatment to address cachexia. Considering 20% cancer patients die from it, why don't we have CURE CACHEXIA campaigns, awareness walks, and fund raising runs?

There are alternative medicine clinics that are successful...unfortunately, from what I am gathering - one week can be $10,000 or more, and of course insurance is useless. You can bet that it takes more than a week to reverse cachexia!

Why is it that everything insurance pays for does us little good? At best, we received the lab work needed, and Rx for a more potent, time release pain killer (which is still not taking care of the pain to allow a restful nights sleep). Marinol has yet to be approved by the insurance company, 5 days later. Which means I am also researching herbs and natural remedies to increase appetite, such as bitters (thanks to a friend), and starting to read up on oleander used to increase appetite. Fighting cancer, and in reality - cachexia, on a shoe string budget is very much all encompassing of my time, to say the least.

Praying for a miracle,

Wednesday, October 15, 2014

An In Depth of our Oncology Appointment & Discussions

A good appointment with the oncologist yesterday in that he was pleasant and wasn't the usual "downer" as we've experienced with the bedside manner of others. Prayers answered.
We really like Dr.Hie not only for his bedside manner, but that he is working with us in the realm of what he can offer at a conventional hospital.

This post will be I feel the need to explain much for family and inquiring minds..
A good profile of testing was ordered. Because insurance companies still believe prostrate cancer is caused by high testosterone, Dr. Hie said insurance would not cover the estradiol test (elevated levels are true cause of not only female cancers, but prostrate as well - learned this is 2010 from Dr. Stacey Bean's wellness seminar in Madison - and many subsequently read books). Since insurance would not cover it I asked to have it removed from the testing list...but as I viewed results was included. I would not doubt this test will cost 100s, if not over 1000, whereas I could have gotten it from ZRT for $40.

Dr. Hie disagreed with me, and the many doctors who treat prostrate cancers by bringing estrogen down. When I named doctors using it he was aware of them and said none conform to which I said, "yes, and are you aware of their success rate?"  No response to that.  (It is always hours later, no longer at the appointment, where I ask myself "WHY didn't you ask the MD to explain why we don't have an epidemic amongst 17 yr old boys?" Platt posed this question in his book "The Miracle of Bio Identical Hormones", which I read in 2011.  It made so much sense I have to wonder why every doctor doesn't see is more complicated than this, of course, as there are hormone conversions taking place; but just as for women - men require a BALANCE of estrogen to progesterone just as females do.

Hie then brought up a drug called Megace. It is a synthetic progesterone...aka progestin. Since progestin is known to cause cancer in women, I brought up my concern. I was told it is only proven to cause cancer in fortunate that men are excluded! Or are they?

Interestingly enough, when I looked up the drug to see what it does - it brings DOWN estradiol in that respect - it is a very good thing as that is exactly what needs to happen. However, I am not sure if it is worth the risk. Since we already have Jesse on a high dose transdermal bHRT progesterone cream via. my hormone expert friend in California, Dr. Platt, my thoughts are that the bHRT dosage can be increased. Hie did not know if transdermal cream could be a high enough dose as compared to an oral drug. I will consult with Dr. P on this. Jesse is also on a number of supplements from Platt formulated to reduce estradiol. The first hormone balance test we paid out of pocket for in July did indicate that Jesse is estrogen dominant (aka cancer promoting state of being).

In discussing Lupron therapy Hie said his goal would be to get Jesse's testosterone below 25. Well, lab results posted today show it at 16. So already below the normal range for a man his age...and again- the estradiol is high.

Seeing that testosterone is already below Hie's goal on its own...we will have to ask his thoughts about that. Might he look a little more closely at my suggestion that estradiol contributes to prostrate cancer, not testosterone? PSA continues to rise, but I did tell Jesse to keep in mind that PSA measures all proteins - both living and dead cancer cells.

As I reviewed Lupron therapy and what is involved, the missing link I see is the lack of using progesterone - the only hormone that keeps estradiol in check. (in the write up on Lupron it states it addresses symptoms, not the cancer itself). It is no surprise that Hie said Lupron therapy does not have a success rate to 5 years for the most part. The root cause is not addressed.

this is getting for part two on discussions with oncology...


Lupron and Low Testosterone

Just wanted to share this article that came in my email from the local International Pharmacy - which always provides good information on hormone balance.
In this article it talks about dangers of low testosterone - which again, makes me question the wisdom of using Lupron or other testosterone lowering drugs.  Are we working towards a remission of a prostrate cancer only to increase risk of stroke or heart attack later on?
I also am aware that the brain needs testosterone for memory function, amongst other things. I was reading the many possible side effects today of Lupron, and in my mind I ask, "really? why would we want to risk going there? ".  The print out from the pharmacist says it can even promote tumor activity - that may be a small risk, but again, why go there? If a person already has tumors, why promote further growth.
In Jesse's case, cachexia (muscle wasting) stems from an aggressive tumor.

Questioning the sensibility, or lack thereof, Lupron treatment...

Tuesday, October 14, 2014

Silvery Anniversary - Celebrated in Oncology

I would have never imagined we would be spending our 25th wedding anniversary meeting with the oncologist. But that is where we spent our morning. I will say our meeting was an answer to prayer. Dr. Hie is SO different from any of the other doctors we have met and talked to on this journey. He is the only one that has not had the doom and gloom attitude.
He was positive, upbeat, did not argue or act condescending of our choice to approach this disease holistically. He understands we want more than 5 years... and he admitted that the treatment he has available for Jesse's type of cancer would not get us to five years.
Dr. Hie and I did have that usual conversation I tend to have with MDs re: hormones...where they feel testosterone causes prostate cancer, and I share that is is the estradiol and imbalance that happens when testosterone drops. I named doctors whom I have learned this from, and Hie's reply is that none follow conventional medicine. Which may be true, but I said they are healing 1000s of people. Because conventional medicine sees testosterone as the "cause" for prostrate cancer, I learned that insurance will not cover the request for an estradiol test for Jesse. Seeing as we would have to pay out of  pocket, I had him take the test off the lab list as I knew it would cost probably $1000s to have that test run at the U.W. whereas I could have it done on our own at a lab for a couple of $100.
Every time I have this conversation with a doctor I always kick myself later, because I always forget to ask the question, "if testosterone is the cause of prostrate cancer, why then is there not an epidemic among 17 year old boys?"  Does this make you wonder, as a reader?  It makes no sense the way conventional medicine sees this.
Megace and Luprin were discussed as hormone therapies. If you read the link to describe Megace, a synthetic progesterone (ie. progestin) - it is clear that its purpose is to counter estradiol - the cancer causing estrogen.
I admit, I forgot my paper with written questions at home...and I forgot to ask if either drug KILLS cancer STEM cells. If they do not, then the cancer grows back - usually more aggressively. To my knowledge (listening to another cancer summit recording, discussing this topic) - there is not conventional method that eliminates stem cells.

The main focus of conversation at our appointment today was discussing pain management options, and how to increase Jesse's appetite.  It is hard to follow the Budwig diet protocol when he is not able to eat the required amount of quark (CC/FSO) and flaxseed mixture. The Budwig protocol is the diet choice for patients experiencing cachexia (muscle wasting).  We were given two prescriptions that hopefully will stimulate appetite as well as manage pain.
I was listening to a integrative oncologist last night, talking about the benefits of three 50 minute BioMat far infrared heat (thermo) treatments each day to reduce tumors, and I realized how important it is for us to do this daily.  Right now Jesse is in too much pain to lie flat for 50 minutes. I don't care how loopy  he gets..we need to manage the pain so he can lie on the BioMat and be sandwiched between the two for proper treatment.

On this special day celebrating 25 years of marriage, my request is for prayer that we get to celebrate a 50th one day, and that pain is lessened and appetite is increased,

Thank you for your prayers,

Friday, October 10, 2014

Improvement in one leg - yeah!!!

Just wanted to share, as this is exciting, that today Jesse was able to get in his truck and for the first time in a long time he DID NOT have to lift his left leg into the truck. His right leg still needed assistance, but the right leg is the one in which the largest cancer lesion was seen in the bone.

He is feeling optimistic today - weak still, but just the fact that he feels like he is getting better and that the cesium chloride and Young Living oils are making a difference, along with all the many other facets of his protocol, is a great feeling.

Thank you Father for hearing our heart's cry!


Thursday, October 9, 2014

When We Are Weak Christ is Our Stronghold

Wanting to give a short update as my sister and her husband are here continuing work on insulating the bay windows. If you live down Brodhead, WI way...Dale Earleywine does EXCELLENT work and we highly recommend him. He is making sure we get as much R value as we can so we don't lose a ton of heat this winter.

Jesse feels that things are changing...pain seems to have lessened. It also seems to shift...sometimes in lower right leg and knee, for days, but then yesterday, it was back in his hip and thigh again.

The greatest prayer need right now is for strength. Pain has lessened, but Jesse feels very weak. There is comfort in knowing that our strength need not be our own, and that our Savior holds us up. Each morning devotion with Jesus is Calling speaks to our hearts, and pretty much has us both in tears...that's a good thing...we need that release.

 Last night Jesse was awake ALL night...not in pain...but he said he just felt wide awake. I think at 3 a.m. I finally heard him snoring...indication of deeper sleep. How odd that I find myself grateful to hear snoring, but he needs sleep. I just move to the living room couch... I think we better get more blankets in that room!

The Young Living essential oils arrived yesterday, although a friend had loaned me Frankincense until ours arrived, as it has been known to heal cancer, including that set into the bone. Studies on the use of Boswellia Sacra oil for cancer can be found at BioMed.  Boswellia serrata, discussed in this article, is a component of the Arbonne joint formula, and once I learned the benefits in regards to cancer of this ingredient, I doubled Jesse's daily supplement allowance. Studies are in infancy, but promising. I had published additional links and information on my Purely Living blog a couple of weeks ago.

I've been using Wintergreen followed by Peppermint to lessen the pain. I basically alternate massages with essential oils, cessium chloride spray, DMSO, and the Arbonne muscle massage gel, and the SeaSource Renewing Body Gelee - the latter of which helps draw lactic acid out of the muscles, which I had read the lactic acid contributes to the problem of cachexia.  Honestly, he should probably be getting a massage every two hours to get the greatest benefit, but I do what I can.

We just keep plugging along, praying, waiting and asking, "How long Lord must we wait?" Each day is tough when you want to see more pronounced improvements...

Time to go mix up the trio drinks of liquid potassium and cesium chloride for the morning round... I feel like a bartender mixing drinks a.m. and p.m., or more likely, a chemist in a lab...what a routine we have come to know, and I feel for every family who goes through this and all the extra tasks it puts on their plate.

A toast to my husband's health! We pray over each drink, food, and massage ...asking for it to heal.


Friday, October 3, 2014

Overwhelmed with Gratitude This Day

Cancer is draining, not only physically, mentally, but also financially. It has been incredible how fast we are burning through our savings. We also learned that Jesse does not have disability.  I can only imagine the stress this has caused him - which does not help one heal from cancer.

My own business is also realizing an impact. I am spending so much time trying to figure out a protocol that can help deter the pain and help heal the bones, that I have had very little time to focus on new business. I am very grateful for the residual income that I receive from clients who re-order on line, and was amazed last month at my month end numbers despite so little activity on my part. Still, my paycheck is about half of what it could be if I were "out there" presenting the benefits of the products.

As I viewed our savings account, and did a quick calculation - it is scary. I am trusting in the Lord to provide in our time of need, and He has just blown us away by generosity of others.

We received a card yesterday with a personal check near equivalent to one of Jesse's paychecks. Thank you Lord for the amazing generosity of this couple. We had not heard from them, but were assured they have been praying.

Jesse used up his vacation this week to take time off to heal, and he was planning to take off next week with pay. He called his boss to request time off with pay...and learned that his co-workers at Electronic Theatre Controls donated FOUR WEEKS of paid time off to help Jesse fight this battle.  I cannot even type this without tears...we were both crying at this news. For those from ETC reading this - may you and your families be blessed tenfold for your generosity!

This morning in our devotion God asked us to CRY OUT TO HIM...and we did. We sob through many of our devotions as of late...crying releases some hormone that is good for we just let the tears flow and eventually we can finish reading the passages before us.

I wanted to share our gratitude right away, before I head out doors for a work project with the neighbor coming over to help. A friend with stage 4 breast cancer is coming over early afternoon to use the BioMat for therapy, and share what she learned at the Budwig Center for cancer treatment in Spain. Later, I am teaching a class and helping a wonderful woman launch her Arbonne business... which means I will be exhausted when I get home.

Tomorrow my sisters and their families are coming to help us with yard work, insulating the bay windows, and a long list of things that we are simply behind in.

With much gratitude for all of you, words cannot express our appreciation.

Wednesday, October 1, 2014

Past Due update

We have had computer issues...laptop is not working. Jesse struggles on stairs and cannot make it to the downstairs office to post. And I have been engrossed in wrapping my brain around the new addition of cesium chloride to the protocol, as well as recommendations by Walter Last, "Overcoming Cancer".

We did talk with the oncologist, Dr. Hie, this past Friday eve. The MRI indicates diffused cancer in the spine. Which means it is spread out, and Dr. Hie said does not provide a targeted area for radiation. He would  like us to consider Luprin - Hormone Replacement Therapy.

I am not sure if he has looked at the list of supplements Jesse is already taking. I have read previously on Luprin and what it is intended to do...and it seems the DIM and EstLess from Platt Wellness is already addressing the hormonal issues of the prostrate gland; along with the high dosage of bio-identical progesterone cream.

Also in the forefront of our mind are those we know personally - who have used Luprin therapy.  The cancer always seems to come back in the bones. Now, since Jesse's cancer is already there...I am not sure where this would leave us. Perhaps we need to ask, "why does Luprin cause cancer to resurface in bones?".
When I asked for a 5 year success rate on Luprin, and if it had been tracked, Dr. Hie said that the data did not offer a 5 year success rate. When I asked why, he did say (appreciate the honesty) that it comes back as another form of cancer. That being said...a release of the "elephant in the room" so to speak...neither of us can see the logic in using a treatment that has very short term success.

It is October 1st. Treatment options aside...these past few weeks seem to be more difficult for me emotionally than for Jesse. As I picked up a freezer in Lyndon Station last Friday - I realized the interstate exit led me to the park Jesse and I discovered last October for our annual anniversary date day.

This year we celebrate our silver wedding anniversary on the 14th...unless God performs the miracle we are praying for by that date, I don't see the two of us discovering any new park, holding hands while kicking up leaves, bird watching..we are not likely going to have the weekend away celebration hoped for. Fall is our very favorite time of year...and each day is a precious gift...we continue to pray that we learn from this journey so it is not without purpose, and continue to trust in the Father for deliverance from this disease.

Blessed by the kindness of our Sisters and Brothers in Christ, we thank all of you.